Jason Stepkovitch, MD • July 1, 2022
I was very recently sitting with a patient who was reviewing an incident she had with a coworker. She had been treated in a hostile and disrespectful manner during a work meeting. This wasn’t the first time, but only one in a series of negative experiences for this patient and the co-worker. We had spent time during a previous session trying to game plan an approach for the meeting, knowing that this other individual was toxic and would try to manipulate things in such a way as to gain control of her in their interactions. Knowing intellectually how one should act when one is being attacked did not prevent the incident from happening, unfortunately. She saw this last interaction, correctly, as a re-enactment, and not just with this individual but with all of the other individuals and situations she had found herself in over the years in which she had not stood up for herself. As we were talking, she asked me, pointedly, “Dr. Stepkovitch, what am I SUPPOSED to do? And I am not talking about him. I am talking about ME.” She had cut to the heart of the matter.
I was referring to the story of Saint George, the early Christian saint who is the patron saint of the English as well as the Georgians, and still venerated by the Orthodox as well as the Catholics to this day. The legend goes as follows:
The dragon demanded tribute from the villagers. After they had run out of livestock and trinkets, they started to give up human tribute once a year to satisfy the dragon’s demands. The villagers, while not at all happy living under the thumb of the dragon, had decided that it was safer to live in servitude than to risk everything by disobeying the appetite of the dragon. One year, the dragon chose the princess to be sacrificed, horrifying the villagers. Saint George, a Roman soldier, heard about the dire situation of the princess. He found the dragon and slew it, thereby liberating the princess.
It’s very difficult to look within. To fully face our fears. To face the parts of ourselves that make us cringe, or even the parts that too often take charge of our lives. But if we are to liberate ourselves we will need courage, for it takes a great amount of courage to stand and face the dragon. And to ultimately defeat it. Good psychotherapy should help us in that struggle.
A funny thing happened during this session. I mentioned that the story of Saint George resonated with me, and that I had often thought that it would be good to write about him. She asked me why I hadn’t. I responded that it was a story that I wasn’t sure I was prepared to write about.
…..So here I am writing. I’d like to thank my patient for pushing me to face the dragon within me. May I continue to do the daily work necessary to slay it. And may my patient, with my help and the help of others around her, slay her dragon, too.
Jason Stepkovitch, MD
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